Grave Side Services

Graveside services will be Friday the 17th, 2pm at Terrace Lawn. Instead of flowers donate to your favorite charity.
Thanks

Blanche Hyde Udy April 12, 2009

Mother passed away today at 1:25 pm today, Easter Sunday. We were in Oregon spending Easter with Whitnie, Lindsay and families and got a call from the nursing home in Nampa about 7:30 am, so we got in the car and tried to make it home. She died about 2 hours before we got there. Friends of ours from church stopped by to see her and the hospice nurse was there with her, but our friends stayed and held her hand till she died. They said it was very peaceful and she never woke up. One of the male nurses at the hospital said " I want you to know I loved your mom and she loved compliments. She liked to give them too, but she really loved to get them." I just thought that was so cute. We donated her clothing to others that didn't have much, in the nursing home, and just brought home her personal items. It will seems strange not to go there anymore. I went twice a day everyday until this week end.

I will go tomorrow to the funeral home to make arrangements. Tentatively the funeral will be Sat.
No viewing and she put in her will Graveside services only. So we will respect her wishes. We really don't expect anyone to come from out of town, except probably some family.

She loved you all and felt your love and prayers in her time of need.

Her Choice

She isn't eating anything solid, but still drinks liquids, juices power milkshakes etc. She doesn't want to get out of bed, and sleeps except when you wake her up. She only says 3 or 4 words at a time, which we all know isn't normal for her. She has been totally off steroids, for about 10 days, and seems to be doing fine. She seems content and doesn't seem in pain. We feel she'll live till her birthday and not sure it will be much longer than that. They say men die before holidays and women after, I've noticed that through people we have known the last few years, that this seems true.

If she could pass away as peaceful as she is now, that would be good.

Not Doing Well

She still has a cold and has given up. She is on oxygen now and doesn't want to get out of bed or feed herself or anything. That would be OK if we knew she were going to die right away, but there is really no indication of that, so I have to find a way to get her to try. She seems to be depressed, but I hate to start her on anti-depressants because she take so much medication as is. They are trying to cut down on her steroids at her request, because she is so puffy. You wouldn't recognize her. Not sure what the next step will be.

How Mom's Doing

She's been in the nursing home about a week and a half. 2 of our daughters, Lindsay and Stacey, came to see her last week so it was a little hectic. Mom has adjusted pretty well. At first she wouldn't eat in the dining room. I think it made her feel old with all the older people in there. They are mostly in wheel chairs, as she is, but mentally most are OK.
She has has a cold, and when I went this morning, she had a panic attack because she couldn't breathing well with her cold and was calling for me. I got her calmed down, and they got her in a wheel chair and she was fine after that.
We were going ATV'ing today, but felt it was better to stay close. I've been over there every couple of hours and she seems to feel safe and secure now.

She now lives in Karcher Estates

Mom became so week that I just couldn't lift her anymore, and I found a very nice nursing home just a few minutes from our house. They even came and picked her up as I would have had trouble getting her into the car. She had a tear in her eye as she left, which broke my heart, but once she got there and saw how nice it was and how kind the staff were, I think she was ok. I waited a few minutes so they could get her in her room first. The rooms are big and have hardwood floors and have been recently remodeled. I will be able to go there often, which will be nice.

Coming Near the End

Mom was doing fairly well last week, then Thursday she ate dinner and was watching her Spanish Soap Opera. I went to get her plate after, and she was fine. Then I went in a half hour later and I couldn't wake her up. So I covered her well in her recliner, and checked on her a few times. I had Les go in with me at 5 am to see how she was. She had such thick covers we couldn't tell if she was breathing. So I got up close to check. Her eyes popped open and she said "where am I and what am I supposed to do" Scared the crap out of me. Yesterday she was worse and only got up long enough to eat and go back to bed. Today she got up and went to the bathroom with her walker. When she sat down, she mentally and physically was gone. I had to have a neighbor help me lift her up and take her to the bedroom and get her into bed. She woke up about 3 hrs later, didn't remember a thing and wasn't making much sense. I feel that will be one of her last times out of bed, unless she makes a miraculous recovery. She can't lift her own body. She can't think much at a time, my neighbor thinks she is either having mini strokes or the cancer is amastatising in the brain, which we knew it was heading that way.

Someone needs to let Afton know now. Mom liked that she had someone that didn't know about the cancer that she could just small talk with. I don't know how much longer she can use the phone if at all. It wouldn't be fair for Afton not to know.

Not sure what our plans are just yet. If she goes soon, I don't want to put her in a nursing home, but I'm not sure how I will know that. Guess I just need to pray a lot.